Why Ghosting is the New Normal in Modern Dating

September 20, 2023

Ghosting, or abruptly ending communication without explanation, has become increasingly common in dating. While ghosting may seem easier than having a difficult conversation, it often leaves the ghosted person hurt, confused, and without closure. So why do people choose ghosting over honesty? There are a few key reasons ghosting has become more normalized:

It's Non-Confrontational

Many people ghost simply because it avoids an uncomfortable confrontation. Rejecting someone outright can feel awkward and mean. Some worry the rejected person may get angry or aggressive. Ghosting dodges this confrontation entirely. While this spares some difficult emotions in the moment, it often causes more hurt feelings in the long run.

It's Easy and Convenient

In a fast-paced, tech-driven dating culture, ghosting provides an easy way out. With online dating and texting, connections are made quickly. But ending those connections takes real effort. For the ghoster, simply cutting off communication takes little time and energy. They can instantly move on to other dating prospects. The convenience factor makes ghosting tempting.

Lack of Investment

Ghosting happens more often in casual dating scenarios. With surface-level connections through apps and minimal in-person contact, some feel there's less investment. They don't owe the other person an explanation since the relationship never got off the ground. While this mindset avoids awkwardness for the ghoster, it discounts the time, energy and emotions the other person put in.

Fear of Backlash

Many people fear an angry or excessive reaction if they reject someone outright. Stories of people lashing out when rejected make some afraid to be direct. Women in particular may feel unsafe shooting someone down due to the possibility of retaliation. Ghosting becomes the safer option. However, disappearing without a trace often causes more obsession than a gentle rejection would.

Younger Generations Experience More Ghosting

While people of all ages ghost, younger generations seem more likely to do so. Millennials and Gen Z use technology to make connections quickly and casually. If those connections don't pan out, ghosting provides an easy escape route. Younger generations may view ghosting as more acceptable, although it remains controversial.

While ghosting will likely continue, more people are realizing its hurtful impact. We now have more discussions online calling out ghosting as rude, cowardly behavior. Some dating apps are instituting anti-ghosting features. With greater awareness, ghosting may diminish as people choose dignity and compassion over avoidance. More people may find the courage for a tough but honest conversation over simply disappearing.

The Takeaway

Ghosting has risen as technology and casual dating created an environment where ending connections takes minimal effort. While it spares some uncomfortable emotions, ghosting often leaves the rejected person hurting without closure. Greater awareness of its impact may help shift dating culture back to more direct, empathic communication. With compassion and courage, we can move away from ghosting as the norm.

Source: Reddit

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